


A Very Innocent Fanfiction

by Kazuto



Series: Innocent RvB Fanfictions(THESE ARE JOKE FANFICTIONS PEOPLE) [1]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Gen, Joke Fic, M/M, Multi, heads up this is a joke fic!! we aren’t promoting ANY of the shit in this, i fucking lost it when i saw this on that rape thread i can’t, this is the worst thing we've ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-26
Updated: 2018-08-26
Packaged: 2019-07-03 01:03:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15808149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kazuto/pseuds/Kazuto
Summary: Grif and Simmons get it on in the Warthog, Tucker and Church watch from a distance and want to get in on the action.Sarge and Donut are there too. Lots of shit goes down, literally.





	A Very Innocent Fanfiction

Grif and Simmons are sitting in their warthog under the shade. Things start to get rowdy in the ‘hog.

Grif removes Simmons codpiece from his suit with Tucker’s energy sword he got from under the steering wheel. However, the sword cuts too deep and fucking kills simmons.

“Oh grif! This is sooo slutty!!” says Simmons and then he dieded.

“yes, it is my love~ nya.” adds Grif, his ears twatching.

After removing all their armor they pull down their bodysuits. Grif, unable to contain his love any longer, sucks off a dead simmons.

Grif moans out, “aaa necrophilia~~”

Grif keeps sucking and sucking as hard he can, drinking the blood from Simmons’ deflated penis.

Out in the distance Tucker and Church watch in deep heat. Their omega needs coming to the surface. Simmons was a real Alpha. 

“wow~ hot reds.”

They shoot Grif in the head and Grif dies instantly. They go down the cliff and make their way to the warthog and stare at the dead reds. Then they also take off their armor and bodysuits and start to stroke their dead bodies. Tucker looks at Simmons’ dick and whistles “Wow, he big. Wish he was mine owo”

Then his eyes gaze over to Grif, where he saw his goddamn sword on the floor. TUCKER FLIPS HIS SHIT AND THEN GOES AND LOOK AT WHERE HIS SWORD WAS SUPPOSE TO BE AND IT WAS STILL THERE SO TUCKER FUCKING QUESTIONS “hOWMST TF THIS FAT ASS GARABAGE BITCH GET A SwoRd??” but regardless he ignored that fact and started to remove the rest of Grif’s armor.

“Church remove the big dicked nerd’s armor.” 

“‘kay.” says Church, i you the good says you no u the e gay.

Both reds are completely undressed, dead, and very hot with some big ass dicks.

Church gets on top of Simmons and starts to diddly darn dry hump him, rough, like how they do in that hardcore gay porn he once saw. Tucker takes off the rest of his body suit and shoves his stick cock in Grif’s THROAT. But in an instant Grif comes back to life and quickly sits up, pushing down Tucker in the process. “ew bitch cockpits ur dick is too sharp wtf.” then Grif kills himself and dies again. Then Tucker felt something weird and turns to Church.

meanwhile...

Sarge and Donut are watching the scene play from a distance. Donut immediately stiffens in his armour and tries to jack off sarge through his red armor.

“Son tf u doin’”

“Bein’ gay. don’t judge, daddy.”

Donut rushes Lopez over to remove Sarge’s codpiece and armour, Lopez is hesitant at first, but he soon complies. 

“I’ll undress you real gud papi.” 

‘’Pinche pendejos, yo no quiero hacer esto.”

Donut strokes him through the bodysuit, feeling the hARD , yet small, YET BIG, BULGE through it.

Meanwhile...

Tucker sighs, eyes roaming the mess of the warthog, hand settling on his stomach, “I think I’m pregregant.”

Church gasps hungrily, suddenly out of breath, “WHAT?”

Church has always wanted a son ever since he was a child. Maybe, just maybe, this was time to fuck a child and commit incest? Would Tucker share? Surely there was enough kids to go around. Maybe he would have twins? Triplets? Sextuplets? Surely he could hope.

“Tucker,” Church pants crawling toward him. When had he fallen to his knees? “How many?”

“yo it’s so much i can’t fucking stand. my stomach expands all the way through blood gulch. I think they’re growing in numbers.”

“this some alien shit~” church moans as actual alien shit starts falling from the sky. Doc pop eye the sailor man rest his arm on church’s shoulder. “This is some real alien shit.” 

“awwwww hawyee” said Texas coming out from one of the clusters of alien shit.

“Bow chika bow wow ow--”

Tex kicks Tucker’s 10 children straight out of his gay womb.

”HOOPLA!” says the rest of the children coming out the tip of Tucker’s cock.

“HOOPLA!” “HOOPLA” “HOOPLA”

End of the world.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks fir reading plz leave slut. Leave kudos i mean uwu.


End file.
